#thisisfostercare // A Letter to My Past, Newly-Licensed, Brand New Foster Parent Self ❤️
Welcome to the wildly unpredictable, vague, at times overwhelming, incredibly heartbreaking, yet joy-filled world of foster care. You will soon learn that pretty much every foster parent, old and new, is still learning as they go along. Don’t feel overwhelmed. You will learn better how everything works, too.
You will soon learn that although you expected some differences, experiencing real life foster care is night and day different than the quick 10-week class and home study you had to complete to become licensed. That’s okay. Just take a deep breath. You’ll soon learn that almost every other foster parent has experienced some of those hard realizations of realities in the system that you are currently experiencing. You aren’t alone.
Depending on the situation, you might soon have the chance to build a relationship with birth parents. So, if you have the opportunity, get to know them. Love them. Love them hard. Love their kids hard. Pour into their lives expecting nothing in return; treat just as you’d want to be treated. Because someday, when you say goodbye to the bundle of joy you’ve been holding in your arms for them, it might not be goodbye after all. Befriend the mothers that you get to meet. Go above and beyond to do so, even when people tell you that you don’t have to try as hard as you are. Trust me. It’s worth it. It’s worth it to look at that child you’ve grown so attached to being held by his or her biological mother and to love what you see. To see her eyes in their eyes. To step back from the parenting role you’ve been in for so long, to be a friend to their mom, and to be someone who still gets to be a part of that child’s life in a small way. That privilege will wreck you in the best way. So, love the child, and pursue the bio family. Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard. It will be worth it. This is the goal of Foster Care. It is worth it. 🌱